


we're the best (not) boys

by orphan_account



Series: fob is 0% cis [1]
Category: Fall Out Boy
Genre: Agender Character, Bigender Character, Coming Out, Demiboy Character, Established Relationship, Fluff, Gender crisis!, Genderqueer Character, I wrote this to express my own current gender confusion, Other, Trans Character(s), this one isn't crack but okay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-16
Updated: 2016-05-16
Packaged: 2018-06-08 18:41:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,437
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6868900
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The one where a domino effect of gender crises caused by one gender crisis leads to an entire band realizing that none of them are cis.</p>
            </blockquote>





	we're the best (not) boys

**Author's Note:**

> I need to stop
> 
> Three in one day???
> 
> Given, this isn't actually crack. It's still slightly unconventional though. 
> 
> Leaving this as a series bc I like the idea. 
> 
> Enjoy!

Patrick's lying awake in bed, Pete nestled into his side, when the thought suddenly hits him. 

"Pete?" He whispers, and Pete stirs, yawning a bit. 

"Mhm?" He asks, looking up at Patrick. 

"I don't think." Patrick starts, swallowing any doubts he has of saying this. "Pete, I don't think I'm a boy."

"Okay." Pete says, going back to snuggling into Patrick's side. 

"Okay?" Patrick asks. 

"Okay." Pete repeats. He sighs, but it's not in disdain or disappointment. "Do you know exactly what you _are_ , then?"

Patrick shakes his head. "No."

"Do you want to try and look it up?" Pete asks, sitting up again. 

Patrick can't help but smile. He's so lucky to have Pete being here for him like this. "Yeah. If that's okay."

Pete smiles back. "I wasn't asleep anyways." 

So they pull out Pete's phone and go through a list of genders, and Patrick dutifully reads the screen until he nearly squeals and points to one. 

"That!" He declares. 

"Genderqueer?" Pete asks, turning to face Patrick. 

Patrick nods. "Yes. That."

"Okay." Pete says again. Then, after a pause, he adds, "Pronouns?"

"Huh?" Patrick frowns. 

"Like, do you want me to keep saying 'him' when referring to you, or..." Pete elaborates. 

Patrick's eyes widen. "There's another option?"

"Tons." Pete laughs at Patrick's giddiness. 

"Okay." Patrick nods. "Like what?"

"Well, obviously there's he/him or she/her, but I feel like you don't want either of those. So then there's they/them, and weirder ones like-" Pete begins, but he's cut off. 

"I like they/them." Patrick announces. 

"Okay." Pete nods. (Does he have any other words than "okay" in his vocabulary? Probably not.) "Okay, sure. Sounds great."

Patrick grins. This feels so empowering. "Thank you."

"Hey, no problem." Pete pulls them in for a hug, then leans back a bit. "Hey, I'm guessing you don't want me to call you my boyfriend anymore?"

Patrick shakes their head. "Uh. No. Is there something else?"

"Datefriend? Datemate?" Pete suggests. 

"I like datemate, it rhymes." Patrick says decisively. 

"Okay." Pete grins. (hE NEEDS TO STOP SAYING THAT OH MY GOD.)

"Okay." Patrick repeats, snuggling up closer to Pete. "Okay."

Pete pulls them even closer. "Always okay."

Patrick smiles into Pete's neck, then promptly falls asleep.

~*~

Patrick still feels full of renewed energy in the morning. Pete doesn't seem completely happy about this. 

"Pete, wake up. Lazy." Patrick huffs, poking Pete's face repeatedly. 

"Fuck off." Pete mutters, swatting their hand away. "I wanna sleep more."

Patrick sighs and crosses their arms. "Well, that's not going to work for me. I'll keep poking you if you don't get up." 

"Fine." Pete sits up reluctantly. "Good fucking morning."

Patrick grins at him. "I feel really good today."

Pete can't help but grin back. "Yeah? That's great."

Patrick climbs over him to get out of bed, and Pete winces as he gets jabbed in the stomach by an elbow. 

"I'm coming." He sighs, following Patrick out to see where everyone else has gotten to. 

Andy and Joe are eating breakfast already. Patrick waves cheerfully at the two of them before taking a seat at the table and pouring themselves a bowl of fruit loops. 

"Someone's in a good mood." Joe comments. 

Patrick just nods. 

"Yeah, Patrick's really happy." Pete says, walking in and wrapping an arm around Patrick's shoulders as he sits down next to them. 

Patrick nods again in agreement. 

"Care to tell us why you're so happy?" Andy asks, shoving a spoonful of whatever health-food-shit flavored cereal he's eating into his mouth. 

Patrick laughs. "No reason."

"Yes reason!" Pete insists. "C'mon. Tell 'em."

Patrick laughs, hinted with nervousness. "Okay, so last night I had a bit of a realization."

"Go on." Andy says, raising a curious eyebrow. 

"I'm." Patrick struggles to find the words to express themselves. "See, I'm not a guy. I'm. Um. Genderqueer."

"Cool." Joe grins. 

"Okay." Andy says, nodding and going back to his cereal. "Pronouns?"

Patrick's breath catches in their throat. They weren't expecting that. They were expecting maybe rejection, or slight disrespect at best. This was...amazing. 

They almost forget Andy's question, but then remember and manage to reply, "Uh. They/them."

"Sounds good." Andy nods again. 

"That's great." Joe adds, still grinning. 

Patrick beams. 

"You gonna eat your cereal?" Pete asks. 

"Yeah. No fruit loops for you." Patrick replies, smirking. Pete pouts. 

~*~

Later, Pete disappears. 

Five minutes after that, Patrick receives a text from him. It's a link. 

It leads to the urban dictionary definition of "demiboy". 

Patrick doesn't have to ask for an explanation. They get it. 

_Pronouns?_ They text back. 

_He/they, either's fine._ Comes the response. 

_Ok. Where'd you go? Want to cuddle :)_ Patrick replies simply. It's not a complicated matter, really. Or at least, it shouldn't be. 

_Bunk. Sounds great ;)_ Pete texts back. 

Patrick smiles and goes off to find Pete. 

They climb into his bunk without a word. 

"Hi." Pete says, turning to them. 

"Hey." Patrick smiles. 

"I texted Andy and Joe already. Andy says it's cool and he wants to remind me that 'demiboy' is not synonymous to 'demigod'. Joe did some research after both of us came out and wants everyone to know that they're bigender." Pete says, answering an unasked question. 

"Okay. They/them, I'm guessing?" Patrick asks. 

"They said any is fine, but they do prefer, well...they." Pete laughs for no reason. Patrick pulls him in close. 

"Andy's kind of left out now." Patrick comments, starting to run their hand through Pete's hair. 

Pete makes a noncommittal noise. "Yeah. I guess."

There's an unspoken "for now" there. 

"I'm proud of you." Patrick says, smiling at Pete. 

"Proud of you, too." Pete smiles back. 

"Oh, um. Is 'boyfriend' still good for you?" Patrick asks, hoping they didn't mess anything up. 

"Mhm." Pete nods. 

"Good." Patrick kisses him softly. "I love you."

"Love you too." Pete whispers in return, yawning. 

They both fall asleep shortly after. 

~*~

"Why is there a band meeting again, Andy?" Joe asks, twirling a lock of hair around their finger. 

"No one in this band is cis." Andy announces. 

There's a moment of silence, then talking. Lots of it. 

"Okay." Pete says. (STOP PETE FROM SAYING "OKAY" 2K16)

"Nice." Joe grins. "That's a good advertising niche."

"Pronouns?" Patrick asks. 

"Still he/him." Andy replies. 

"So you're...?" Pete raises an eyebrow. 

"Agender." Andy answers. 

"Cool. I can see that." Pete grins. 

"Oh my god, we are a band with no cis people. Has that happened before?" Joe asks. 

"None of us even fit exactly in the gender binary." Patrick points out. 

"Cool." Pete grins. 

"Are we going to say anything?" Andy asks. 

Everyone shares a look, and they all shrug in unison. 

~*~

It comes out quite by accident. 

It's some random interview, who knows, and the interviewer asks Pete to tell a funny story that happened sometime in the bus. 

Pete laughs. "Okay, okay. So, last week, Patrick was trying to cook in the shitty bus stove, right? And while trying to cook the bacon, they totally burned-"

"They?" The interviewer asks, raising his definitely-waxed eyebrow at the pronoun usage. 

Pete turns to Patrick for what to say. 

"Uh, yeah. They." Patrick mutters. "Um. My pronouns. I'm. Uh, genderqueer."

The interviewer doesn't seem fazed whatsoever. "Oh my! Seems I've been misgendering you, then. So sorry about that."

Patrick laughs. "No, it's no problem. Uh, see, no one really knows this, but...no one in our band is cisgender, actually."

The interviewer cracks a smile. "Wow, I really find that so cool. I think we need a lot more representation in the 'T' of 'LGBT' in music, y'know? So. I can ask for all your pronouns, right?"

"That's great, actually." Pete nods, smiling back. "Uh, mine are he/they, but most people just use he, so that's fine. And, by the way, I'm a demiboy."

"He/him." Andy supplies. "I'm agender."

"Any work, really, but I do prefer people using they/them, mostly." Joe grins widely at the interviewer. "And I'm bigender. Seriously, you're great. Best interviewer."

The interviewer laughs. "Oh, I wouldn't say that."

"Anyway!" Pete interrupts. "I was telling the story, remember? So Patrick was trying to cook with the shitty bus stove, right? And then they burned the _pan_. Like, caught it on fire. Seriously. Shouldn't that be impossible? Are they just that bad at cooking? Probably."

He continues, adding more detail as he goes. Patrick smiles as Pete's rant drones on. There's no way they'd rather have anything than this. With this ragtag band of gender bandits, or whatever they were (gender bandits sounds cool, Patrick thinks). 

This is perfect.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [boycott the cis, detox just to transition](https://archiveofourown.org/works/7044658) by [orphan_account](https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account)




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